http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/02/technology/ftc-suggests-do-not-track-feature-for-mobile-software-and-apps.html?ref=business
Edward Watt wrote an article on February 1, 2013 addressing the how apps have been breaking the private policy laws. Many apps have ignored these laws and one of them, Path, had to pay a fine of $800,000 because of it. The company was charged with violating federal privacy protections with children. Even though this has always been a big problem, the government didn't think that much of it but now since everything is being done on mobile devices they have to take action. This has become such a huge deal because smartphones let so many different companies gain information from their phones such as wireless service providers, mobile operating system developers, and app companies. Path, for example, was collecting personal data such as phone numbers, addresses, usernames for Facebook and Twitter, and even dates of birth. They even downloaded this information with kids under 13 breaking the Children's Online Privacy Protection Act. An app has even been created, "Moms With Apps", to alert parents about the advertising and data-collection aimed at children.
Watt does a great job of explaining the situation that is happening with the dangers of downloading certain apps. One rhetorical device that Watt used a lot is appositive. This is when you put a noun next to another noun to describe a person. Watt doing this makes his article clearer and better to understand. Instead of listing just names, he describes the occupation of the person. He also uses many quotes from important people dealing with this situation. Lastly, he provides a solution for parents who are worried about this privacy law being broken so they can find out more information.
You don't have to say "2013" you can just say "February 1st"... But in general i liked what you wrote about and how you supported your argument. Be careful also how you word your sentence. Good Job:)
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